Inunderstandably bothered

Vietnam was really so beautiful, I really hope I can go explore the country with friends sometime.

Oh for what I have no idea, but I've been reduced to eating cup soup for breakfast. Whatever is weighing on my mind right now has the power to reduce me to a completely non-functional mess for a human being, and the worst part is I have absolutely no clue what is causing me to feel so awful. I, regrettably, wish I could do nothing else but stare at the ceiling fan spin and let the hours whittle out of my fingers.

It's so tempting to just not do anything right now. I also want to fall off the face of the planet, if that was a thing you could do on and off.

I crawl steadily towards the reality that a new academic year is starting and it's only going to be busier than the last, considering I've thrown myself head first into a bunch of new and scary (albeit exciting) commitments. The most exciting thing, pressing forward, would be the Freshman Orientation camps that I'm going to be participating in and am probably going to have a ball of a time doing, as well as slowly losing my voice. Small sacrifices for the greater good of us all I suppose (although my nefarious plan is to try and get through camp season unscathed).

The last two weeks or so since I've gotten out of Hospital from that real nasty bout of inflamed kidneys have been good, and some of the relationships that I'd settle into have changed- or don't exist anymore. Let's just say that for better or for worse, the struggling bud of negativity which threatened to leech it's way fully into my life never got a chance to see the sunshine. In the end it's important to come back around and realize that some people are really not good for you- even in the short run. And that it's probably also better to, because of that- let them go quietly. I suppose whoever is up there, beyond reason and understanding, knew the better thing to do for me.

If not, it's been really been the regular humdrum for me of work and training, and meeting friends when I can. I feel like slowly, at least, the shooting is getting a little more stable. While I want to shoot today, the rain continues to pour outside my window- and so I'm stuck here with my thoughts and jarring lack of appetite. It's been pretty nice I guess, these last two weeks. I got to go catch my friend's band perform at Holland V, had good company on and off to hang out with and spend time with, and have generally been having a pretty swell time before the camp kicks in tomorrow.

I'm starting to wonder if I did enough with my holiday, and I can honestly say I did. I went out there and really grabbed as many experiences as I could I guess, considering that I couldn't do too much with my weird twice a week work - training schedule that ate up Tuesdays and Thursdays. But I've met some pretty swell people and I'm very glad I did meet them. And I've also done cool things I never thought I'd do- like skateboard around North Spine like a complete menace to human traffic. The skateboarding part is already a huge deal because I tried this before and failed terribly.

Hopefully the coming year is as kind to me as this holiday has been, and I can continue curating experiences and memories.

x