Pondering Existence.
It's a strangely philosophical title, and yet one that so many can relate to.
I wonder, if it's a lot to ask for for a little cooperation. You know, as a class. Maybe I was wrong to think that the class was bonded. Maybe within themselves, but not me.
I admit, I signed up to be a councillor myself. I admit, I should have seen the challenges of being a "Key Leadership Personnel", and being under the nose of one of the council teachers, being in her class. I admit, I do not have any right to ask you to not skip classes and school, because to a certain extent I do too. But not willingly, no.
Pain incapacitates me. Sure, it's 'funny' and 'impossible' to have cramps so bad they prevent you from leaving the house. You make a crack out of it, tell me to "might as well remove my womb", that I "Pon also right? Cramps what cramps?" To the point my PE teacher laughs at me too. Says that I'm the ringleader of people who skip school and lessons. Point fingers. Laugh. Giggle. I admit, I hate PE.
Doesn't mean, that it's a condition to be made fun of.
I was put in hospital twice. Had in IV drip. Have to go for ultrasounds. Have to take painkillers stronger than your silly pink panadol. My cramps don't subside. They keep, coming, back. It's not funny. I vomited and collasped. I broke out in cold sweat. Was transferred from doctor to doctor, hospital to hospital. And there is no cure. No way of pointing out how to make it stop hurting me. And you laugh. Cramps only. Won't die.
Yeah sure. Go on.
You pon school so regularly, the teacher questions me. I have no excuses for you, neither am I prepared to rat you out like some wet blanket. I'm not that kind of person. But you laugh at me, say I'm scared of the teacher, say I'm protecting my position, say that you don't care. Say that it doesn't concern you. Fine. I can take all of that. Mock me, say that "Im scared mommy", ask "You scared of her ah?" Hey. I fall sick. I fall sick easily because my immune system is weak. Say I go doctor on purpose. I'm on antibiotics. Cough syrup. Bigesic. I've had influenza A and B before. Come on, cut me some slack.
Have it your way. Today I'm beaten by your responses to me.
I swore to serve my school. And I will. I'll continue to support you in any way I can, in my own way, though it comes off uncaring and blatant. I'm not some role model, I admit. But you haven't killed me off just yet.
xoxo
I wonder, if it's a lot to ask for for a little cooperation. You know, as a class. Maybe I was wrong to think that the class was bonded. Maybe within themselves, but not me.
I admit, I signed up to be a councillor myself. I admit, I should have seen the challenges of being a "Key Leadership Personnel", and being under the nose of one of the council teachers, being in her class. I admit, I do not have any right to ask you to not skip classes and school, because to a certain extent I do too. But not willingly, no.
Pain incapacitates me. Sure, it's 'funny' and 'impossible' to have cramps so bad they prevent you from leaving the house. You make a crack out of it, tell me to "might as well remove my womb", that I "Pon also right? Cramps what cramps?" To the point my PE teacher laughs at me too. Says that I'm the ringleader of people who skip school and lessons. Point fingers. Laugh. Giggle. I admit, I hate PE.
Doesn't mean, that it's a condition to be made fun of.
I was put in hospital twice. Had in IV drip. Have to go for ultrasounds. Have to take painkillers stronger than your silly pink panadol. My cramps don't subside. They keep, coming, back. It's not funny. I vomited and collasped. I broke out in cold sweat. Was transferred from doctor to doctor, hospital to hospital. And there is no cure. No way of pointing out how to make it stop hurting me. And you laugh. Cramps only. Won't die.
Yeah sure. Go on.
You pon school so regularly, the teacher questions me. I have no excuses for you, neither am I prepared to rat you out like some wet blanket. I'm not that kind of person. But you laugh at me, say I'm scared of the teacher, say I'm protecting my position, say that you don't care. Say that it doesn't concern you. Fine. I can take all of that. Mock me, say that "Im scared mommy", ask "You scared of her ah?" Hey. I fall sick. I fall sick easily because my immune system is weak. Say I go doctor on purpose. I'm on antibiotics. Cough syrup. Bigesic. I've had influenza A and B before. Come on, cut me some slack.
Have it your way. Today I'm beaten by your responses to me.
I swore to serve my school. And I will. I'll continue to support you in any way I can, in my own way, though it comes off uncaring and blatant. I'm not some role model, I admit. But you haven't killed me off just yet.
xoxo
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